How to Be More Assertive
Just state the facts and
Hi I'm Christine Hassler, and I'm a life coach, author and speaker, here today with About.com to give you five tips on how to be more assertive.Tip #1, what other people think of you is none of your business. If you're constantly worried about what someone's going to say or what they're going to think, you're going to be less likely to really say what's on your mind. So drop that story about what other people think and really speak what's important to you.Tip #2, ask for what you want. Don't assume that people can read your mind, or will know what you really need. And don't be afraid to really ask for what you want. You may not always get it, but at least you asked.Tip #3, really believe in what you say and get behind it. People can tell and they really listen when people speak with passion and enthusiasm and energy. And trust me, if you really believe in what you say, other people will believe you too.Tip #4, use "I" language. Assertive people are good at ownership, they're good at talking in first person: "I think this," "I feel this," rather than "you did this" or "you didn't do this" or "you are this." The more you can really speak in an empowered "I" language, the more empowering your communication will be.Tip #5, stick to the facts. If you really want to be assertive, try not to bring in a lot of opinions or judgments about what's wrong with the situation. Just state the facts, and the plan of action that you'd like to take.Thanks for watching, and to learn more, visit us online at About.com.